Anxiety Forum

[Ugh]

Anytime I am in a crowd, my face starts to turn beat red and I start sweating, even if no one is paying any attention to me. And anytime a manager at work wants to talk to me, I start to turn beat red and get worried thinking I'm in trouble or something. It's so embarrassing. Right now I'm training to be a backhoe operator and I'm completely fine running it if no one is around, but as soon as I feel like people are watching me, I get nervous and frantic and I start to lose focus on the job I should be doing. I also stutter all of the time when I'm around people, yet if I talk to myself when no one's around, I can talk perfectly (and ironically enough I'm a terrific writer- I've gotten published in books before and won a few awards back in the day.)

This is ruining my job, my ability to get an education, and my opportunity to participate in my local community. I can't go anywhere without my face turning red and when I do go places I leave immediately because I don't want people to see like I'm a nervous wreck.

I'm so f***ing sick of this. It's controlling my damned life. I don't know what to do. Is there any medication or anything that will help me from this?

I'm 19 and this has been controlling me for many years, I just don't know how much longer I can take it... it's pissing me off.

[joey9]

I was plagued with the blushing curse for years. It got so bad at uni i would do anything to avoid being trapped in a situation where i might be called on to say anything out loud because I knew I would blush. It completely ruined many years of my life - I would never put myself forward for anything because I didn't dare risk blushing in public and have everyone think i was a freak. However there is hope - I am almost totally recovered and I barely give blushing a thought now. Which is precisely WHY i am recovered. I know now that everyone blushes from time to time when they get embarrased - they just don't worry about it. Your worry about blushing is what is making you blush. Avoiding situations where you fear you may blush will only make things worse. My blushing got better half by accident - as I got older life became busier, i was meeting more and more people and having to small talk a lot at work. I didn't have a chance to avoid these situations so I had to face them - and because i was busy I didn't have time to dwell on whether or not I would blush if i had to say anything. So my advice is to get out there as much as you can - say hello to as many people as you can at work and slowly increase your interactions to include some uninteresting small talk that doesn't make you feel threatened. Do it gradually and you will slowly start to feel more and more comfortable in your work environment. It is hard but it is worth it, even if you feel frightened to start with. I bet you don't blush when you speak to your close friends and family. Because you're not thinking that you might. Also do more things where you have to interact with people. Make small talk in shops when you are paying for things. Practice practice practice. Of course I still blush every now and then - we all do - but it doesn't dominate my life in the way it used to. And one more thing - blushing is a very small part of who you are. When I started a particular study course i used to blush every time i would speak to anyone i felt was slightly scarey. At the end of the course a man that had become a good friend told me that he remembered me at the start and how i used to blush when i spoke to him. I was really embarassed of course but at the end of the day it hadn't stopped him continuing to talk to me and becoming a good friend. Other people don't only see your blushing - they see all your other attributes too.

[Wren]

Ugh, I too blush very often. I usually don't just blush out of the blue or when no one is paying any attention to me, but if I am ever mentioned or acknowledged at all I tend to blush, sometimes getting very red. It is extremely aggravating and embarrassing...especially since everyone else thinks it's so funny to call you out about it instead of just letting it be. As if I'm not embarrassed enough, that only makes it worse. The worst part is that it won't even be embarrassment that causes me to blush. Any time I'm acknowledged or mentioned, even when I'm feeling totally calm and there's no reason to blush at all and I do not feel embarrassed, I just blush and I can't even help it. And then everyone thinks I'm embarrassed or has to laugh and call me out on the fact that I'm blushing...and well, it all just sucks. It really just makes me want to never be looked at or acknowledge or addressed or talked to in front of a group or even a few people. I really hate it! I have no idea how to stop this, since it happens seemingly out of my control and not just when I'm in an embarrassing or uncomfortable situation or position. Sigh....

[R8DRN8SHN]

I usually blush when I speak in front of a group or the whole class. I had a couple anxiety attacks when I tried to look at a girl in the eyes for some reason. Anyways Im taking paxil 20 mg but I am not going to use 30 mg. Im doing it because its not working for me. Maybe it'll work for you. I don't know but Paxil is the only drug approved by the FDA for social anxiety disorder or blushing.

[palaoca]

I too suffer from this uncontrollable blushing. I feel confident while I'm speaking but at the same time, I start feeling warm, and when I know my face is turning red, I feel that I am being knee-capped and start losing my train of thought. Everyone is focused on me and I feel I just need to end my discussion. I hate it. I know it's some kind of brain/emotional/chemical/hormonal/whatever disorder because I have no control over it. I start out fine, then my body just takes over.

Sometimes I just try to power through it but what a short emotional ride it is. Weird, weird. It has happened since High School, in class when I was called on, then in social situations, work, even just trying to tell a joke.

If you find a cure that is not pharma meds, let me know. Until then, I'll just try to power through them and so should you. I think its better to feel uncontrollably embarrassed than to avoid people and life. I am always real proud of myself when after a successful discussion I realize that I didn't turn red and I start thinking that there might be hope after all.

P