Anxiety Forum

[juliana]

I have taken 0.5 mg of Clonazepam for panic attacks on an almost daily basis for over 2 years now. When I was severely agoraphobic, I didn't suffer from depression. In fact, I hadn't had a depressive episode in more than 10 years. I've been experiencing quite severe depression over the last 7 months, though. I recently read that Clonazepam can actually cause depression. Does anyone have any experience with this? Is anyone else taking this drug? How does it affect you?

[jitters]

I havent taken them myself but apparently the most frequently occurring adverse reactions to clonazepam are referable to depression. So this is likely the trigger of the depression if it is a new addition to your life if not it could be anxiety related as they do often come hand in hand.

Duncan
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In a mad world only the mad are sane

Akira Kurosawa

[juliana]

Thanks Jitters. I hadn't had a major problem with depression in over 10 years, but the anxiety has been with me since 2000. Even when I was in my flat alone for 4 years, I didn't get depressed. I wasn't happy, mind you, I was often very sad, but I wasn't DEPRESSED. Then, last spring, I took Wellbutrin for about 6 weeks and it threw me into a black hole. I stopped taking it, started feeling better and then my uncle committed suicide in July. It's understandable that that would make me very sad, but I got beyond sad and haven't come out of it. I've been getting worse rather than better over the past 7 months. The weekends are the worst. During the week when I have to go to work, I put on a smiling face, act like my usual cheerful self (it's an act, but at least it's a distraction), but my emotions are totally blunted and on the weekends, I just feel miserable. The worst times are when I'm half-asleep half-awake in the morning. I'm not conscious enough to try to control my racing thoughts and distract myself, so I feel like my mind is torturing me. It's like a dark maelstrom -- pure chaos and pain. Things that should be enjoyable or should make me happy have little or no effect on me. I don't want to talk to my family. I go weeks without checking my voicemail and I don't return phonecalls. I just can't make myself do it. I also obsess and worry constantly about my student loan debts. When I found out I had gotten a new (much better) job, I was very excited and cheerful for a few hours, but then got home from the office and cried all evening. (That was a bit of a relief, actually, because I hadn't cried in months.) Then I spent the entire weekend feeling hopeless and miserable.

I'm on a 10-day break from work between jobs right now and I'm trying my best to keep myself busy so the depression doesn't consume me. Idle hands, idle minds and all that... I get exhausted with constantly trying to distract myself and occupy my mind all the time. It's a constant battle with myself.

I still maintain my sense of humour most of the time and I find I feel better the longer I'm awake. I'm at my best late at night, but that doesn't work well with a 9 to 5 job. I have started taking Cipralex (Lexapro) in hopes that it will help with both the anxiety and depression so I can stop taking Clonazepam. I didn't want to take an anti-depressant. I was hoping the depression would pass within a month or two like it used to when I was in my early 20s. It's not getting better though and I'm looking for any way I can to get out of this hole. I know that I need something for my anxiety because I haven't been able to function without anti-anxiety meds and I worry that Clonazepam may be contributing to this depressive state. Thanks for listening to my ramblings. I'm wordy, in case you hadn't noticed.